Bumps and Dents of the Bumper and of the Soul

CRUNCH!!!  Now that's a sound you never want to hear when backing up a vehicle, but CRUNCH is just what I heard. It was Friday evening and I was backing into a coveted spot at the gas station on my way home from work. The place was hopping and it was the one open pump. I turned to look over my right shoulder, hand on the back of the passenger seat. I eased back slowly and CRUNCH, I hit the sneaky little concrete pole that was just short enough to be out of my line of sight, but just tall enough to take out my bumper and my rear tail light assembly. PHOOEY!!! Not the way I wanted to start the weekend.

I exchanged info with the gas station clerk and made my way home. We were supposed to leave for MD Anderson on Sunday and I really didn't have time to deal with the fall out from my little concrete collision. Oh well, no crying over spilled milk (or busted taillight as the case may be). Sometimes it just is as it is. And sometimes, that just isn't good enough for me. 

I remembered another dented bumper from my past and how the body shop had fixed it with the help of a little heat and on Saturday, I decided that I wasn't going down without a fight. Now I know at this point most rational human beings would grab the phone number for a body shop, but I grabbed my phone and started to google DIY videos.  I found several videos of people fixing their bumpers with a little hot water or the heat from a hairdryer. Now I should probably add that my dent was a little more than a dent. My bumper was hanging off the and the dent was more of a large crease, but hey, what did I have to lose?  I decided to give it a try. Let's just say that hot water and hairdryers are better for the head than the "tail". I didn't have much luck. I would need some big guns. A little more research led me to discover a heating tool that might make the task a little easier. I ran to the nearest auto shop and as luck would have it I found the little gem -- on sale even!

Rodney wasn't home and heaven forbid I wait around for help. I like a challenge. I removed the tail light assembly and began heating the bumper that was hanging awkwardly from the vehicle.  I had high hopes for how this was going to work. Except it didn't. Try as I might, I still couldn't get the dent to pop out. Apply more heat. Apply more pressure. No luck.  I repeated this process over and over but was no closer to fixing my bumper than when I began. As the bumper got hotter, so did my frustration. My arms were getting sore, I was sweating, I burned my hand, and I just didn't have the strength to fix it. I was pushing with all my might and getting nowhere. Without really even thinking about it I voiced the thought, "God, I'm not strong enough to do this alone." And just like that, the dent gave way under my hands. With one concession that I wasn't strong enough on my own, it was as if all the strength I needed was suddenly available to me.  I did a little victory dance in celebration of conquering the bumper, ordered the taillight assembly to replace the broken one, and walked away feeling like a conqueror.

We left for Houston the next day for my appointments at MD Anderson. This journey was going to be another test of strength. Thanks to COVID, Rodney couldn't go into the hospital with me. That is bad enough on a regular appointment, but this time I was having a biopsy that would require out-patient surgery.  I would be put completely under and he couldn't walk me in. He couldn't hear the doctor's instructions. He couldn't wait with me until they took me back. He couldn't be with me in recovery. I was by myself. Once again the words I uttered in the garage came spilling into my mind.  "God, I'm not strong enough to do this alone." And just like that concession became strength in dealing with the dent in my bumper, it became strength in dealing with the dent in my soul. Peace replaced fear. Strength replaced weakness. Faith replaced doubt.

2 Corinthians 12:9 says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” We have a tendency to think His power is made perfect in our strength, but the opposite is true.  Only when we realize we can't do life in our own power do we find the true source of strength. And it is a huge relief. I have spent so much of my life being confident in my strength and in my ability and feeling like a failure when I didn't feel strong. I still struggle with that sometimes, but I am beginning to get it through my thick head that HE is the source of power and HE shows off best when I get out of the way and admit I need him.  

My run-in with the concrete pole wasn't an accident. It was an object lesson. It was an opportunity for God to plant a seed to show me the power available to me when I admit, "I can't do this."  God cares about all of our bumps and dents and so desires to give us the strength to deal with them when we call out to him. 

I don't know what has dented your bumper this week, but I know where you can get the strength you need to deal with it. It comes from leaning on the one who GIVES you strength.  "Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships,  in persecutions, in difficulties. FOR WHEN I AM WEAK, THEN I AM STRONG." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

My bumper isn't perfect. A body shop might have done it a little better, but I am going to leave it just as it is. I like having a visible reminder of God's power in my weakness. He is so good. Thank you so much for your prayers as we have traveled this week. We are still waiting on the pathology report on the lymph node (and I still owe you a story on that one, too). We hope to hear soon, but we have full assurance that God is hearing all of our prayers and already has this dent figured out! 

Love ya! Mean it!